When abbreviations go horribly wrong, we all win.
There are three instances of a word being shortened to “ASS” below. I had about 150 choices and narrowed it down to three. A LOT of things shorten to “ASS.”
Here are 11 extremely unfortunate moments in abbreviations, captured and immortalized by the Internet. Enjoy…
1 | 2th Avenue
I’ve been to Ybor City in Tampa. Everyone I saw either seemed like they were on their way to a strip club or a photo shoot titled “Men in Sunglasses With No Less Than Six Tattoos Wearing a Black Tank Top.” Which is why it’s kind of amazing that anyone had the wherewithal to notice this sign and take a picture.
2 | Awaiting President Obama’s arrival
I mean… they clearly have enough room in the graphic to include the “AIN.”
3 | Winnie the Pooh
To get the obligatory Simpsons reference out of the way, are POO and ASS taken? Also, it took me 15 times looking at this before I realized they also abbreviated Winnie.
4 | Meth Bible Camp
Throwing a little meth into the mix would certainly would make the arts and crafts at the camp more interesting. You’ve seen someone glue dried macaroni to a piece of paper… but have you ever seen someone do that for 72 hours straight?
5 | Want to become a member of The Vag?
Two years ago I did a list of 11 Acronyms Whose Dirty Meanings Have Usurped Their Clean Meanings. I feel like the folks at the Vag should take a look and perhaps rethink how they brand themselves. Unless, of course, they primarily deal in Georgia O’Keeffe reprints.
6 | The Hunt For Lincoln’s Ass
As we know, Lincoln is the president who was second-most likely to be gay. So this could just as easily be the title of a gay porn period piece.
7 | IBS Returns to Vegas
Since it’s returning to Vegas, then, by definition, when IBS happens in Vegas it doesn’t stay in Vegas.
8 | Death By…
Neil DeGrasse Tyson takes a moment from his busy schedule as a renown astrophysicist to quickly pump out some Dolemite fan fiction.
9 | The Kelly Kirby Kindergarten Piano Method
I’m guessing this method involves primarily playing the white keys.
10 | The worst Jerry Sandusky abbreviation of all
I mean, come on BBC. It was the one and only time you couldn’t make a mistake like this… and you made a mistake like this. Fifteen years ago, our news stations didn’t report YOUR tragic news as “Princess Die.”
11 | The Port Townsend School District, or PTSD
Yes, in retrospect, I should’ve been listening to a manlier song when I took the screenshot.