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written by Sam Greenspan

On my first anniversary, I lament these 11 lists not getting the eyeballs I hoped they would.

I’ve decided that, every year, I’m going to compile the 11 11 Points lists that really, for whatever reason, didn’t get the views or response that I thought they would. Maybe this will bring them more attention. Or at least pacify me.

All 11 of these received fewer than 10,000 total views in the year.

1 | 11 Most Ridiculous DMX Moments

I absolutely love lunatics and DMX is one of the greatest lunatics of modern times. This list chronicled his best moments, from accusing his baby mama of raping him… to busting through a gate at JFK Airport and claiming he was a federal agent… to buying $45 worth of drugs from an undercover cop… and everything in between.

For whatever reason, it toiled toward the bottom of my lists in popularity, which is a huge shame… mainly because, no matter who you are or what you do, reading about DMX’s life really makes you feel good about your own sanity.

2 | 11 Disappointments About He-Man, In Retrospect

I figured the nostalgia factor of He-Man… plus some really, really interesting revelations I dug up… would make this list go viral. It didn’t even come close.

3 | 11 Imaginary Places I’d Love to Visit

Instead of just following in line with every other list of imaginary places on the Internet and listing the stereotypical answers (Atlantis, Shangri-La, El Dorado, etc.) I came up with WAY different (and hopefully funnier) choices.

Parts Unknown, the room where Jews run the world, suicide bomber “heaven,” Duckburg and so, so many more. I think it’s a good read.

4 | 11 Weirdest Late-Career Team Changes in Sports

I made this list as Brett Favre was deciding whether or not to go to the New York Jets. It’s got some great, weird photos — Pete Rose as an Expo, Patrick Ewing as a Sonic, Reggie White as a Panther, and more — all of which I figured sports fans would love seeing. Nope.

5 | 11 Very Strange Ways China’s Preparing to Host the Olympics

I know the Olympics are over, but this list should live on. Communist countries are such fertile ground for hilarity… and China’s sequence of absurd decision after absurd decision in advance of the 2008 Olympics is just unreal.

6 | 11 Strangest Romance Novel Genres

I mean… there are Mormon romance novels (besides Twilight). NASCAR romance novels. An entire subgenre devoted to time travel romance novels. I remember researching this one forever to try to find the best and the strangest.

7 | 11 Sports Whose Participants May Or May Not Be Athletes

This list would be perfect for the new comments feature of 11 Points… so, so, so much room for debate.

8 | 11 Lessons My Friends and I Learned Frying a Turkey

I think this list is really funny… and not just “you had to be there” funny. Anyone who wants to fry a turkey should read this list… and learn from our mistakes that very well could’ve blown up a city block.

9 | 11 Most Useless Sports Statistics

There’s a reason why a lot of my sports lists are on here. Because I used to lump my NFL picks in with the other sports lists, these didn’t get that many appearances in the “related links” section.

10 | 11 Awesomely Obscure Phobias

I did 11 photos (or found videos) to go along with all 11 of the ludicrous phobias I found. This one’s a good, quick raed.

11 | 11 Defunct College Bowls That Sound Awesome

Lots of research went into this one, and I found a ton of really interesting little facts about bowl games that don’t exist anymore, from one in Cuba to one featuring the California Raisins.

OK. Self-promotion over. We now resume regularly scheduled 11 Points lists.