Public looming, old timey bikes, asparagus water and so much more.
I don’t have any specific beef with hipster culture. Grass fed, hormone-free beef on a gluten-free faux-caccia bun served with tempura-battered turnips fried in coconut oil. So consider this a loving, friendly homage rather than spiteful spitefest.
Here are 11 photos of hipster products, lifestyle items and general nonsense running amok.
1 | Loom life
Why do something relaxing like knitting when you could do something ostentatious and cumbersome like public loom weaving?
2 | Asparagus water
Whole Foods can get away with overcharging for a lot of things, but jacking up the price of water to $6 by throwing three stalks of asparagus in the bottle seems like a bridge too far.
3 | Old timey bike + Prius
Question: Is an old timey bike on the back of a Prius the most hipster-on-hipster combo or…
4 | Old timey bike + Apple store
…does the old timey bike parked in front of an Apple store get that designation?
5 | Dyed armpit hair
Spending money to dye your armpit hair a wacky color to match your regular hair that’s dyed a wacky color makes so many statements that it may be impossible to keep them all straight.
6 | (Hopefully) inspired by Chaplin
Not every old fashioned facial hair style needs to make a comeback.
7 | Typewriting away
It would be so tough to write on a typewriter now that we’re all so spoiled with luxuries like “backspace” and “saving.” I guess it does beat a quill and ink though?
8 | Slicing way the organic properties
I had no idea that a bread slicer could de-organicify something, so I’ve learned something here.
9 | Listening to some music
I can’t tell if the bright blue plastic record player completes the guy’s bit or undermines it. I’m leaning toward undermines. If he’d REALLY wanted to make a statement he’d have packed an entire massive gramophone. Or perhaps commissioned a small baroque string quartet to play outside?
10 | Designer stump
It feels very un-green to buy a tree stump — but only when it’s $98. Like, if a hobo was selling stumps for $4 or some vittles, my mind wouldn’t go to the environment. Here? It’s my first thought.
11 | So many stripes
If this is a still shot from a live-action movie version of a Dr. Seuss book, I rescind its placement on this list.