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written by Sam Greenspan

The Mounties are on the case for this very Canadian crime.

It’s quickly becoming the Year of Canada here on 11 Points. I’ve already done 11 Pictures That Are SO Canada and A Book About a Woman Having Sex With a Bear Once Won Canada’s Top Literary Award. I even visited Vancouver, one of the most beautiful places in the world, and took but one photo.

Taken at 1:25 pm on 6/4/16 in Vancouver, BC. #ilovecanada

A photo posted by Sam Greenspan (@11points) on

And today, I have yet another celebration of the pure, unfiltered, beautiful Canada.

Back on August 15th, two men broke into a beer store in Russell, Manitoba, Canada. And one of them was wearing a hockey jersey, pads, and a goalie mask — and was carrying a hockey stick. Even though it’s August. There’s no hockey offseason in Manitoba.

He and his buddy stole $2,500 worth of Budweiser and got out of there. (That’s the only letdown of the story. Budweiser? If they’d stolen Molson or Labatt Blue or, say, maple syrup, this could’ve been the most Canadian crime of all time.)

The Mounties are trying to track the guys down (and have released the surveillance video below), but unfortunately that goalie mask was a pretty effective disguise.

They DO have one clue, though.

According to the media release from the RCMP on Friday: “He may’ve been a defenseman or forward in disguise, as he was wearing jersey number 17 — a non-traditional number for goalies.”

You hear that, Manitoba? Know any forwards or defensemen with the number 17 who have delusions of goalie grandeur? Help the Mounties out.

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